We Are Very Rare & We Are Mostly Men

Ahh the question of the week.

Tali “ why would get that tattooed on your chest”?

It’s turned into my favorite conversation, my favorite question, and ultimately my favorite trick on the rest of the human population that find themselves looking at my chest not so much to look at my boobs (which is odd because everyone looks at boobs just to look at boobs…men, women, children) , but to figure out if that saying means those boobs are fake and I’m really a man or if it’s just a very off joke. Anyway I look at it, it’s highly amusing and wonderful and hilarious and that means that this tat has officially served the first half of it’s purpose which was simply to get people asking questions. Why you ask? Because people don’t’ ask enough of those these days. I miss when everyone questioned everything…trust wasn’t thrown around as loosely as it is now. Trust at this point in the game is a total whore…it’s unfortunate. We wanted to be more sure back then…wanted a definite…wanted to know what was going on and why. Now we’re just a lazy people. Someone says heyyy this is how it is..we go oh mmk and keep it moving. I don’t like it. I like my tattoo…it makes you ask questions.

Rant over…blog continuing….now.

So, to proceed. The tattoo reads very simply. “We are very rare & we are mostly men”. Here’s a lil background. It came from the movie Girl Interrupted. Now those of you who have seen it and know where the line comes from can go ahead and skip to the next paragraph. Those who don’t know of the movie or what it’s about need to read because it gives a good basis to my reasoning for it. The movie is about a 5 star mental institution in the 60’s. Most people who were in there had problems that today could be solved with a few meds but instead were given shock treatment and kept heavily sedated. The line comes from when some of the girls break into the shrinks office to see what he had written about them during their weekly sessions. Angelina Jolie’s character finds her file, states that she’s a sociopath to the rest of the young women looking over their files as well and goes on to say… we are very rare & we are mostly men. In the 60’s sociopaths weren’t rare per say but were rarely diagnosed…when they were it was found that statistically speaking most diagnosed sociopaths were men. It is my favorite line from the movie…clearly…and it is my favorite movie…clearly. And now you know where I got the line from ..clearly…moving on.

Here’s the big answer…which I’m hoping won’t ruin the question that I love ever so dearly. Here is what this means to me. The second half of this tats purpose and why it is on my chest. Hope you’re happy people….for writing this blog takes all the mystery out of it. Lol

I’ll start with Women: Women are TYPICALLY brought up to be the sensitive, gentle, care giving, nurtures. The mothers. The wives. The shoulder to lean on. The emotional train wrecks. This is all encouraged in a woman’s nature. We are “supposed” to be fragile…like a flower. That’s why losing our virginity is “supposed” to be such a sacred thing. Woman are “supposed” to be the lovers. We are “supposed” to wear our emotions on our sleeve and I guess that means that we’re “supposed” to be trusting with no questions asked. Women are supposed to be “women”. I’m not saying that I agree or believe in all of these things if I did I’d have to gouge my eyes out with my toe nail, but as I said before…typically, this is the ideal way of a woman in most people’s eyes.

Onto the Men: Men are TYPICALLY brought up to be the workers, providers, disciplinarians, protectors, fighters, the fearless, and the strong. The husband. The father. The voice of reason. Men are “supposed” to show no emotion. Men are never “supposed” to cry or show fear. Men are “supposed” to count on no one but themselves. Men are supposed to be “men”

Now clearly, this differs from culture to culture and I’ve just generalized for point making sake but how far off is it really? Not very I don’t think…agree or disagree. It’s just my opinion anyway.

With all of that being said….women and men go through their lives with those attributes instilled in their subconscious…whether they follow it or not in their daily lives there’s always that glimmer of this is how I was told I was supposed to act. Typically.

The way I look at it is that women spend their lives trying to live up to those subconscious attributes and in the end of it all end up being bitter, jaded, over emotional about the wrong things, uber sensitive to the point of bi-polar. We have been through so much hurt, pain (both physical and emotional), loss, distress, misunderstanding that by the time we’re 80 we are sitting there scratchin our “balls” showing no emotions. Completely turning off any amount of sensitive or fragile that we thought we had left. We are what we are…and we don’t give a shit if you like us or not. We’re fearless, strong, and will do anything to protect what we have left. We don’t count on anyone but ourselves.

Men spend their lives trying to live up to their subconscious attributes that have been instilled during their training/upbringing as well. Ha we found once common ground!!!! They have pushed people away that got too close and not showed the right people the right emotions because they had to stay strong and self protective. They’ve worked hard to provide for their families but didn’t spend enough time getting to know them. And they’ve been stubborn and prideful. At the end of it all when they’re 80 and can’t get that damn urinary catheter in by themselves they’re scared, fearful, and in pain. They want someone there to tell them it’ll be ok and that they’ll make it through it. All the people that have left them behind because of old fallouts or disagreements based on nothing but pride are long gone and if there’s still a wife in their life she’s too busy being bitter and jaded because of her own shit to care about his. So he sits there by himself, fragile, lonely, and with a severe loss of pride which is inevitably what a woman feels like somewhere along her journey of becoming a “woman” as well.

A true role reversal if I’ve ever seen one….

And Like I said ..this is generalized and in a “typical” frame of mind. I’m aware it differs. I’m aware some of us have none of these issues and I’m aware that some of us have all of these issues…. but then again I’m also very much aware that We are all very rare…and we are mostly men.


VLOG Of Why I decided To Participate in MTV’s True Life: I can’t Have Sex.

Just wanted to give an idea as to why I decided to do the MTV documentary. Fingers crossed that it goes according to plan and that enough awareness is raised that the rest of the world can’t stop talking about those IC people. lol